The Result of 11 grade was out just last day and today I heard a boy committed suicide because he failed the exam. Who to blame? Education System, family, the boy himself, or something else?
Wikipedia says ‘Over 90 % of people who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death’’. It doesn’t need to be serious mental issues always, sometimes mild depression can be the reason for suicidal thoughts.
Sometimes just the thought that makes you feel you cannot cope with the overwhelming life situation can be a major cause behind suicidal thoughts or an attempt. Sometimes anxiety and impulsivity that leads an individual to not see any hope for the future can encourage him to think suicide as a solution. And sometimes, due to lack of proper guidance or due to lack of somebody listening to us, it can simply be the reason behind the choice-suicide.
Psychology says, there can be various reasons behind the suicidal thought or attempt. Besides psychosis, depression, lack of coping capacity, the impulsivity of an individual, genetics is also linked to suicidal thoughts. People who committed suicide or have suicidal thoughts are more likely to have a family history of suicide. Environment, Social-cultural factors/status also play a role in wanting to end life.
Now the questions again rise: WHOM TO BLAME FOR?
According to registered cases in the police department of Nepal, the latest data shows 13 people commit suicide every single day. And whom to blame for??
As a Psychology graduate, I can say, the major reason behind such cases is ‘The Negligence of Mental health or Mental Issue’’ (at least here in our country, Nepal). We still stigmatize the mental issues and regard it as a taboo rather than consulting professionals. We still do not try to realize the triggering factor that can lead any individual to attempt suicide. We still try to hide any issue that we or our family members going through. We still do not listen to our loved ones about the sadness and problems they are going through. Most importantly, we ignore the fact that mental health is also an important aspect of overall well-being.
So, when the cases of suicidal thoughts and suicidal attempts are increasing day by day, we from our side should start working for it. Here, My request for all of us are –
1) We, as family members, should start understanding our loved ones. If anybody at our home has psychological difficulty, we must make them consult professional help. And if they are going through minor sadness of if anytime they talk about ending their life, we should be more careful about that case. We as family, can listen to them and try to make them cope with the ups and downs of life, rather than making their life more miserable by blaming. And if our loved one’s time and again talk about ending life or is depressed or seen as having low emotional coping capacity, we should seek professional help as soon as possible.
2) We, as a friend, should start understanding them and giving proper advice. If we have our friends finding difficulty to cope up with problems, we can be the initial help providers. Listening to them is almost here. Trust me, Listening is the Key!
3) We, as School/Colleges, should start thinking about student’s mentality and deal with them accordingly rather than from their academic marks. School, colleges are one of the major places where an individual spends their time. If we can give professional and personal help from the institution, it will be much easier for the individual to realize the suicidal triggering factor and understand the way out. We also can arrange classes to make them be more able to cope with emotional vulnerability. We can work to increase their mental well-being.
4) We, as a country, must start giving priority to Mental Well-being and health. We should raise more awareness about mental issues and their effects. We should be more responsive to the deaths of the individuals and start bringing plans and policies to stop this.
5) We, as individuals,should start thinking and loving our life more. We must think that our life is also attached to the lives of our loved and dear ones. Committing suicide is not the end of the .problems or can never be the ultimate life solution. We should rather share the problem and seek help. We should know there are loads of people to love and understand us.
Hence, we, in the form of many responsible members, are all to blame for those cases that are registered as suicidal cases each day.
I, as a Psychology graduate and responsible member of the society, will take responsibility for this. I will give my best to minimize this major issue and encourage people to have proper mental well-being. Will you do the same?
Will you be able to play your part to minimize the suicidal cases or any mental mishaps?
Disclaimer: This piece was originally written in Feb 2019; but because of its relevancy today as well as Suicide rate is increasing than ever, posting it today.
Kripa is a recent Ph.D. Scholar in Psychology in Tribhuvan University. She has been working as Lecturer at Padmakanya Multiple Campus and Executive Director/Counselor at Psychbigyaan Network Nepal-PNN. She can be contacted in her email – firstname.lastname@example.org.
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